Happy Vernal Equinox!
After experiencing the magic of the prayer cross, you just know that there is so much more tacky Christian decor out there just waiting to be exposed. That’s why Corey of God is Pretend and I have decided to host a little contest to see who can dredge up the best piece of Christian Kitsch.
It may sound like shooting loaves and fishes in a barrel since Christians are famous for, well, religious tzotzkes, but we want to see the tackiest, tastelessest, schlockiest, whateveriest Christian industry item we can.
Photos are preferable, but detailed descriptions will work, too. And this needs to be authentic Christian Kitsch, not photoshopped pictures, homemade crafts, or atheist parody items. We’re talking about things that have been marketed to Christians.
Now what kind of contest would it be without a prize? The prize is a snowglobe of Santa Claus visiting the manger of baby Jesus:
.
Just kidding! The actual prize is a scarlet A t-shirt from The Out Campaign.
Who’s game? Post your findings in the comments or post a link to your personal blog with your findings. Also, be sure to head over to God is Pretend to check out other great submissions!
Contest ends May 7th. Be there or be Left Behind!
April 9th, 2009 - 12:26 pm
Sounds good to me!
April 9th, 2009 - 1:15 pm
Hi Corey,
Gaudy and God-dy…
April 9th, 2009 - 5:12 pm
I like this one complete with other accessories for toddlers and young children. Though the kids may ask, “Hey, where’s the Easter Bunny and his goodies? WTF!”
http://tinyurl.com/chb647
April 9th, 2009 - 5:20 pm
So, this is where Philip Pullman got his idea for his Armoured Bears!
http://tinyurl.com/db64ad
April 10th, 2009 - 7:28 am
Sir Andrew the Amoured Bear? Are you named after him?
April 12th, 2009 - 7:03 pm
[...] t-shirt from the Out Campaign, so find a piece of Christian paraphernalia and enter it in the contest!Oh, and these items have to be real (no photoshopping or parody items) so you may have to visit [...]
April 12th, 2009 - 9:31 pm
[...] currently hosting a Tacky Xian Kitsch Contest along with Corey from God is Pretend to find the tackiest Christian knick-knack out [...]
April 13th, 2009 - 8:08 am
This can’t be a contest entry, bc how could I enter my own contest, but OMG…
http://www.crown-of-thorns.com/product_info.php?products_id=177
April 14th, 2009 - 10:54 pm
[...] A” t-shirt from the Out Campaign, so find a piece of Christian paraphernalia and enter it in the contest!Oh, and these items have to be real (no photoshopping or parody items) so you may have to visit [...]
April 18th, 2009 - 11:00 am
from my mother’s own southern baptist kitchen:
http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c150/primeministerpriddy/PICT2605-1.jpg
April 18th, 2009 - 12:49 pm
Wynde, that is pretty darn funny. I bet my mom would love it (she lives in Israel).
April 19th, 2009 - 11:55 am
What Would Jesus Do? The Game!
http://www.amazon.com/WWJD-What-Would-Jesus-Game/dp/B00000IVOU
April 20th, 2009 - 9:36 am
Andy,
Let’s all get together for a rousing round of this game. I’m curious to see the questions– do you actually win the game, or is it completely non-competitive?
Rod and Todd Flanders didn’t use dice in boardgames bc they were wicked (a form of gambling?)
April 21st, 2009 - 12:05 am
Now I know what action figure would have been the first one to have this heart ripped out by my Mortal Kombat toys when I was 10.
April 21st, 2009 - 7:52 am
Hi Derek,
Which one? In researching this contest, I found resurrection action figures (Roman soldiers and whatnot), and various other action figures from bible scenes that made me wonder what the designers were thinking.
April 23rd, 2009 - 5:13 pm
[...] on over to my fellow Jewmanist’s site Not My God for shifts ‘n googles. After experiencing the magic of the prayer cross, you just know that [...]
April 23rd, 2009 - 5:49 pm
I vote for the Ladies Camo Army of God Bible Cover - Large
Bible Cases open flat and feature inside pockets, pen loops, satin ribbon bookmarks, and embroidered designs on the front pocket. Color matched zipper and stitching, lightweight soft padding, and zipper pull with Christian fish complete the construction.
http://www.swansoninc.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=176&products_id=4727
I am sure every good christian lady is hoping for one of these.
April 24th, 2009 - 9:02 am
Hi Eric,
I’d rather have a frillier, old lady style bible cover for stashing my sex materials. Camouflage=army of god= hilarious
April 24th, 2009 - 10:55 pm
Well you should check out http://mybelovedsgarden.net/ for christian sex toys. Basically sex toys, but with bad web design.
I especially like:
“Since early 2004 we have been blessed to be featured in several publications, helping us to get the word out about Christian Love, Sex and Intimacy (yes even Christians have sex :)) “
April 25th, 2009 - 8:07 am
Eric,
AWESOME! BTW, who else would use the term “marital aids”?
April 29th, 2009 - 9:59 am
i saw these and was thoroughly creeped out
http://www.armorofgodpjs.com/
April 29th, 2009 - 10:02 am
IN THE SAN FERNANDO MISSION, LOCATED IN SAN FERNANDO CALIFORNIA, AT THE NORTH END OF LOS ANGELES COUNTY, IS THE MADONNA ROOM. THERE, EXISTS AN OVERWHELMING SUPPLY OF VARIOUS MADONNA SCULPTURE ON SHELVES TO THE CEILING ALL AROUND THE ROOM. THE UNEXPECTED TOUCH OF ADDITIONAL KITCH IS THAT WHEN YOU STEP INTO THE ROOM MUSIC IS AUTOMATICALLY PIPED IN. CAN MUSIC BE KITCH TOO?
April 29th, 2009 - 10:03 am
DOES THIS MEAN IT’S TOO LONG?
April 29th, 2009 - 5:44 pm
This is nothing that hasn’t been passed around before, but I’m a big fan of the inappropriate Jesus with children lightswitch:
http://logicnotfour.blogspot.com/2008/02/awesome.html
Someone really should have though abut where that switch was going to end up.
April 30th, 2009 - 8:50 am
Dear JaneKay,
Can music be kitsch? You bet your rosary! I’d love to see a picture/hear more detail, if you can…
Alex,
Great lightswitch. Was the placement of the switch itself on purpose as a fun anti-religion novelty, or just a really cool Freudian “accident”?
May 3rd, 2009 - 5:27 am
Just today I saw that god ugly prayer cross. I saw this post a couple of days ago not knowing that this contest was in response to that stupid thing. I was gonna submit the prayer cross. How dumb of me.
Great idea for a contest.
May 3rd, 2009 - 5:33 am
How about “Armor of God PJ’s?” I found it on this blog. They have a picture too. Just scroll down to the couple of smiling kids.
http://aboulet.com/2008/08/14/christian-kitsch/
May 4th, 2009 - 8:38 am
Yo Celeste,
We already have the Armor of God PJs (just the thing to put the kids to sleep!!), but some great t-shirts on this site you sent. I think I recently saw someone wear the Starbucks one.
I also love the Jesus footprint sneakers. I think archaeologists discovered ancient Greek sandals from a prostitute that left the footrpint “follow me.”
Who knew ancient Greek johns were so literate?